A Couple of Zeus Amongst gods Turns Another
Factorians- I stand before you all a pumped up dude with the pumped up kicks. Our Roman toga-touting running Adonis Joe Jacobis Maximus Jacobs is celebrating a birthday! STOP! As if that is not exciting enough, his cycling mentor who also shares the adonis gene (only his comes out more often in cycling and in knowledge) Geoffrey Clark is ALSO celebrating a birthday too! WOAH! Dr. Love is speechless…
Now that the speechlessness has passed… We all know you are thinking “How do my two favorite Sneakorian leaders celebrate their birthdays?” Well, luckily Dr. Love always has the inside scoop. Maximus is taking his birthday, well… to the max! He started out drinking non-alcoholic mammosas with some protein laden eggs sandwiched in between two pounds of pork roll and tied together with strips of bacon. It took all of this to hold Maximus over after have rode his bike one hour for every year he has been alive, which means he spent the last 28 hours riding his bike! Impressive? I would say so, yeah! Joe represents Sneaker Factory out on the roads all day everyday. Now, normally Maximus would go with a marble cake, but today, today he went bold- a coffee cake with a side of Alberto Contadors’ private stock of Peroni Eye-talian bira. Maximus was quoted as saying, “Wow! Thanks, Al. Despite not being American brewed, Peroni is decent.” Maximus also celebrated with literally thousands of Factorians at the Basking Ridge store as customers flocked to the store to see how much older and wiser he looked. The customers were thrilled to see that somehow, the leader of the Jacobins managed to look even wiser! Happy birthday, Maximus!
On the other hand, Geoff celebrated by hosting the biggest party that has ever rocked the tri-state area. Jay-Z opened the VIP section of his 40/40 club in NYC to Geoff and his loyal followers in both the running and the cycling world as well as his connections in the gangsta rap world. Although he was technically the host of the party, Jay-Z was unable to attend as he was caught up on tour with Kanye West, who also texted Geoff to say he could not come. Snoop Dogg and Ice-T both agreed it was one of the “hottest parties they ever been to.” Flava Flav really brought the house down when introducing Geoff and his wife to the party, meanwhile the paparazzi claim that Plaxico Burress was not allowed into the club on the account of he was wearing sweatpants, and we all remember of what happened last time… When T.I. came out and sang happy birthday with Madonna, and Katy Perry singing backups, it is said that even the most hardened of rappers (The Game and Ice Cube) shed a single tear in the sheer beauty of the celebration. Happy Birthday, Geoff!
We all would like to say happy birthday to these two MANagers, friends, and all around great men who we are fortunate enough to call friends and co-workers! We hope you enjoy your days, and are blessed with many, many more with health and happiness!
-Dr. Love saying hug yourself a Sneaker Factory manager!